Why They Don't Want to Hear It

And what that means for your strategy.

---

I write Toxic Workplace Survival Guy because toxic workplaces make me angry. I want to help as many people as possible do as I did: survive long enough to emerge with my mental health, dignity and career intact, on my own terms. A big thank-you to all those who’ve become paid subscribers.

And if you think Toxic Workplace Survival Guy might help somebody you know, please click the button below to refer a friend. I’m offering a chance to nominate my next post (five referrals); request a video on a specific topic (10 referrals); and a free 45-minute consultation on navigating your toxic workplace (25 referrals) in recognition of your support. Thank you!

---

Survival Tool #11: Read the Room

The root of the malaise afflicting your toxic workplace is the entitled, authoritarian, demeaning and manipulative behaviour of people at the top. (Survival Tool#8: See Through the Confusion).

These people set the tone for your organisation, and due to the difficulties many people have in establishing healthy boundaries (due to attachment wounding in infancy), their actions mostly go unchallenged.

Within this context, you will naturally feel a sense of righteous indignation.

The sheer injustice of the kinds of treatment you and your colleagues are experiencing hour-by-hour leaves you incredulous at times.

The stress of dealing with this distorted reality begins to dominate your waking moments.

Even after you’ve set work aside for the day, your mind cannot stop dwelling on the latest slight. (Survival Tool #9: Don’t Let Your Anger Come Out Sideways).

You’re constantly caught up in thinking about ways you might be able to shift the toxic dynamics you’re stuck in (for now).

And you assume that building some kind of shared awareness of the situation by discussing it with others will help make things right.

You want people in management positions to know what you’re going through.

If only they knew, they would do something to help, you reason — still unschooled in the ways of the toxic workplace, and exposed to its traps.

They Don’t Want to Know

We explored how little you can expect in terms of support from co-workers in Survival Tool #4: Confide with Care.

Toxic Workplace Survival Guy wants to build on that guidance by zeroing in on why your manager isn’t interested in your problems — and what that means for your strategy.

Think back to the last time somebody complained to you about somebody else.

Maybe this was a friend or family member who was venting their sense of being wronged by a relative, or an ex.

Maybe it was your child, complaining about what another child had said or done.